Wanted – ordinary physio for ordinary clinic
First name surname physio clinic is seeking a completely ordinary private practice physio for a musculoskeletal position we have vacant at our clinic.
You don’t need to know anything about private practice physio or business for this role, which is fine because we will take just about anyone with a heartbeat and AHPRA registration, because chances are you will be the only person who applies for this position.
New graduates are welcome to apply for this role, and we will promise you mentoring but because the owner is so busy treating a million patients we will mentor you for about a month and then send you to one PD course a year and that will be all. You will be encouraged to learn from other physios in our clinic, who will be happy to teach you, and frankly your relationships with them will be the only reason you will stay at our clinic past your probationary period.
On your first day you will seeing patients. Unlike workplaces who value their people and take them through a well planned induction process as to why our clinic exists, the thoughts and philosophies of the clinic owner, telling you intimately what is expected of you and how you can succeed in this role, including what personal qualities we require and which behaviours aren’t tolerated in our clinic, we will just not tell you any of this and let you coast through. But we may jump on you for doing the wrong thing every now and then – not because the clinic owner didn’t teach you, but because we expect you to read the owner’s mind – as they had to when they started their career. This baptism of fire will suit you well for your future employment in the physio world, until you eventually become so disillusioned you quite physio altogether and start that band you wanted to start as a teenager. Unfortunately this whole situation could have been prevented.
You will be paid an average salary, and may even be hired as a contractor as the clinic owner wants to put all the risk on you, but wants to benefit from the rewards as you get busy and finally show that you know what you are doing after a couple of years (if you stay that long).
We are scared about charging what we are worth so we charge a bargain basement price – and for that reason we can’t pay you very well, so your dreams of owning a home, especially if you live in a capital city, might as well remain as dreams. Despite this you will do one evening a week and one Saturday a fortnight, just to kill your spirits.
When you start with us you may find patients a bit scary and when you can’t help them after 1-2 sessions you won’t ask them to come back. But don’t worry – the owner spends lots of money on Facebook marketing as it is the in thing to do, but they just don’t track it very well, so they may as well be pissing money up against a wall. Every now and then the owner will wonder why their diary is always full, but yours is always half full, verging on empty.
When the phone rings you know who it will be – another loyal patient of the clinic owner, ringing up and asking to see them today – but they can’t as the owner has a 2 week wait list, but if only they wanted to see you as you have 5 spaces today! No wonder they all want to see the owner, after all the place is called first name surname physio clinic.
As the years float aimlessly by and the only thing the owner wants from you is to see more patients and get out and meet more doctors (which scares the hell out of you as you have never been trained what to say to them). What the hell are you actually gaining by working for first name surname physio? What about all your friends who are now senior associates in law firms, doctors, accountants with their names on the door of the places they work? It sucks meeting up with these people now and hearing about all of the life goals they are kicking, and you are just floating along, seeing the same type of patients you saw when you first started – just doing a better job with them and earning a little bit more.
So time to open your own clinic – surely you can do it all better than first name surname. You are really frustrated with being taken advantage of and not mentored over the years. Surely this will be your ticket to the big time.
Take the plunge – sign the lease, get all of the paperwork sorted out. Suddenly meeting the GPs isn’t so hard after all. You have your passion back. You get busy really quickly, and some of the patients from first name surname clinic even follow you over to your first name your surname clinic. To keep the costs down and earn that money you feel you deserve you are seeing loads of patients, and you even have a waiting list. That admin person can wait – but now you are too busy: time to hire a physio!
So you put up a job ad on Seek:
Ordinary physio wanted for your first name your surname clinic
And the cycle begins again…
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